Last week was an unusually intense one for our little family. So much work to be done. Garret staying up late to write papers and study for tests, me finishing up a project at work, Garret looking for a part-time job, me running hard to train for the 10K.
Tuesday was a no-good-very-bad-day for me, and the 3.5 mile run after work was a little rough. I just felt tired and weak and brittle and frustrated that I wasn’t running nearly as well as I had on Sunday at the 5K.
Wednesday was different and better, thank you Lord. Thursday was beautiful and sunny and my 5 mile run with Meghan was shockingly successful and encouraging. By that night, Garret was done with course work for the week and had done a great job on everything, and we could finally relax together before a busy weekend.
But, at one point on Tuesday I definitely did just breakdown and cry for a while. (I’m a weeper.) Eventually, the tears stopped, I half-heartedly wiped the mascara off my face, and made myself get dressed to go run.
Reflecting on the week, I thought about pushing through life’s tear-fulls and uphills and downhills. Thursday when Garret walked out the door to go to class, I casually said “Just push through it, then you can crash tonight.” (That’s kinda my motto when it comes to college and studying at all hours.)
But that got me thinking that the “pushing through” concept is actually a pretty big deal. For me the phrase calls to mind exhaustion, sports, running, studying, oh, and my time as a competitive power-lifter in high school. (And no, I will not share photos of that – ha.)
But I think there’s more to it than sports metaphors. You have to have something to push towards, and for things to really work in the long-term it has to be something more than relief, sleep, comfort, normalcy. You have to have faith that there is something that matters enough for you to break yourself to get there. Something you believe in enough to push through the hurting and troubles and doubt.
By grace, we press on. When it feels like you have nothing to go on but sweat and tears and Word, press on. Roll towards the raw goodness of Life in the only One who truly gives life – complicated messy lovely life and one day unending life, so worth pushing towards.
“Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”
I’d love to know, what are you pushing through right now? What makes it worth it?